Dear Friends and Family,

We always plan on updating our journal more frequently, but now another full year has passed. For obvious reasons, updating this journal is very difficult. I think each year we keep hoping to reach a new stage in our lives without Quincy or find something very joyous to write about, but that never seems to happen…so we wait. Yet we do have moments of joy in our lives to balance those moments of heart-pounding grief that still invade our hearts, less frequently now, but still there. When those thoughts of missing her come, they come almost with a greater sadness because it has been so long since she has been with us (approaching four years) and still so long until we can be with her again.

Anyway, it only makes sense to open this journal entry with sports. In the Lee family, they have been our saving grace, providing each one of us with fun and normalcy that helped us through Quincy’s illness and death, and continue to provide us with comfortable routines that move us forward. During the summer, we attended the All-Star Baseball game played in San Francisco at AT&T Park where the SF Giants play in regular season. We spent three days in the city and had a great time going to the homerun derby and all-star game. The boys will have great memories from that week from watching all the famous and infamous players of baseball.

Currently, it is basketball season and Roger is coaching both Brody’s 8th grade team and Keenan’s 6th grade team. Roger loves coaching and enjoys watching all the boys on his teams improve throughout the season. His office is still close to home in Walnut Creek which allows him to be very involved with the boys. As a family we all enjoy basketball and root for the Golden State Warriors watching as many games as we can. In the spring, Brody will play tennis and umpire local Little League baseball games like he did last year and Keenan will play his last year of baseball in the Little League Majors.

After the boys started school in August, I finally found some courage, or rather felt it was the right time to start going through some of Quincy’s things. All of her clothing seems so small now when I compare it to the size of her girlfriends who are all approaching age 10. It’s strange but I think of Quincy as the same size and age of her friends. We can’t believe that she will be 10 in March. Looking at each dress and outfit brought a smile to my face, remembering how she would wear each piece and the last time she wore it. She would love to change into a “party” dress if we were going out or over to a friend’s house for dinner. I found I couldn’t just bag her things and put them on the curb for goodwill; I had to find a person or place that would benefit from her things. She had so much stuff, like any child that spends a lot of time in the hospital will have from receiving so many gifts from kind-hearted people trying to make her feel better. Many of her toddler things I brought to a crisis nursery center; her puzzles, games and bikes (the boys too) I gave to schools in Richmond. It felt very good knowing her treasured possessions were needed and would be used. Her clothing was harder to part with and I saved her favorite outfits and items that triggered a happy memory for me. The rest I gave to friends that have little girls. Going through her stuff is still a very slow and draining process, but it does feel good to move forward and I know Quincy would be happy that her things are being enjoyed by other little girls.

This past fall, I’ve spent my time working on the Quincy Lee Foundation. In September, we made up some “bingo bags” filled with toys and brought them in for the children in treatment at UCSF. I also worked with one of Quincy’s wonderful nurses and did some shopping for the pediatric intensive care rooms, in order to make them more comfortable for the patients. In October we filled plastic pumpkins with goodies for the kids and made treats for the staff. All was greatly appreciated by the good people at UCSF. It finally feels comfortable to go back there and the best part is that I am known as “Quincy’s Mom.” I love that title! After Thanksgiving, we had a Holiday fundraising party at the home of a good friend. We had various vendors selling their wares along with our own QLF “nanny-knit” scarves, bookmarks, photo ornaments and cards, and candy. The evening was a big success. I’m not sure what the next fundraiser will be but we are working on several ideas and will keep you posted.

This year also brought us full circle in life. Roger’s father passed away at the end of November. About a year ago he had been diagnosed with lung cancer due to the many years he worked as a plumber with asbestos. He was blessed with 87 wonderful years with the exception of his last six months. He was a very kind and warm-hearted man who was deeply loved by all who knew him. We will really miss him.

“The things that matter most in our lives are not the fantastic or grand. They are the moments when we touch one another, when we are there in the most attentive or caring way.”
-Jack Kornfield

Love,

Lisa and Roger